"... your Father knows what you need before you ask Him."
These bible verses come to me as I reflect on the gift that was your prayers the day before and the day of my C-section on April 16th. Like a multitude of prisms dangling before the light of God, your prayers refracted His light into my life and left me suspended in a state of rainbow prisms and resulting peace and serenity.
Because of this, would you believe that I smiled the entire time they were operating? Fear had little to no room in my heart as I anticipated the imminent arrival of our precious child. Only moments before, just sitting outside the Operating Room, after the nurse injected me with blood thinners did I shake briefly in anticipation of what was about to take place.
Once in the operating room, my midwife was able to come in with me while Duane had to wait just outside. The room was buzzing with a handful of medical staff in blue scrubs and the operating table lay before me like a cross... arm rests out waiting to strap me down. I looked at the faces of the people who would play a part in my baby's arrival and I simply said, "Thank you so much for helping me bring my baby into this world... every one of you."
The young Anesthetist asked me to sit on the edge of the operating table and I held my midwife's hands while I curled my back in anticipation of the needle. My mind went back nearly thirteen years ago to a similar moment when a student tried to insert the needle in my spine but he kept missing. The process was excruciating and after several minutes of painful pokes, I had yelled "would someone who knows what their doing please take over??!!" With that memory flash, I turned to the young man about to poke my spine and confessed "I'm failing terribly at being brave about this part."
To my delightful surprise, he got it on the first try! I turned to him with a big smile and said "That wasn't bad at all! You're fantastic! Oh... I'm starting to go numb..."
They laid me down quickly and they worked fast in strapping my arms and legs, raising a sheet across my chest, placing probes on my chest to monitor my heart, strapping a blood pressure machine to my arm and an oximeter on my finger... I felt my body shifting around as they began washing my belly down and the doctor walked in. I lay there smiling... To lighten the mood, I piped up again and said "At least you guys have some really pretty lights in here!"
The Anesthetist stayed by my head and was an unexpected support! Duane was finally let in and sat by my head with a slight look of unease. He later told me that they let him in just as they had already started cutting me open. For a firefighter and farmer who has seen his fair share of cuts, slices, and other gory details, I had not expected this unease. But he admitted that it's very different when it's your wife being operated on.
Within ten minutes, we heard the cries of our precious baby and the announcement "It's a Girl!" To which I turned to Duane as the tears just started to flow at the glorious and much anticipated sound of her beautiful presence and said "That little stinker! "He" was a girl all along! It's our Avalyn Hope!"
Another ten minutes came and went before Avalyn was brought to Duane and as he showed her to me and I soaked in her dark hair and dark eyes, I exclaimed that one finally looked like me! She reminded me so much of my own baby pictures. It took another twenty minutes before they were done sewing me back up and I was taken to the recovery room. There I was able to hold Avalyn despite a bunch of wires inhibiting the real connection... IV, blood pressure monitor, and an overwhelming sense of nausea... not exactly the recipe for an amazing bonding moment.
But bonding we did and a successful attempt at nursing. The very image I had focused on... holding my precious child while nursing... looking into her little eyes and seeing every little perfect detail God took the time to make... all of it was right there... finally.
It was finally real.
And so was the vomiting that ensued! Ah yes, despite the moment being short lived, it was sacred nonetheless. And so it is that you have played a special role in Avalyn's arrival through your prayers. Gratitude spills forth in such measure that I cannot tell you in words what your prayers did to uplift me... to calm my every fear. We are honoured to have you celebrate with us our precious Avalyn Hope... our "Beautiful Breath of Life".