Hello dear ones! Long time no write.
Ever heard that "life is like a roll of toilet paper" saying? The further into it you get, the faster it seems to run out? (Something like that, I always get these sayings wrong!). Well, my dear ones, that's life over in the Vaags household. And indeed, there is LOTS of toilet paper involved!
I wanted to take a quick moment to share with you a little thing that happened with our four year old son, Ethan. Last week, he was having a hard time sharing his toys with big sister, Anika, and younger sister, Sivana. Duane had to go downstairs and remind him on a couple of occasions to let the girls play with the toys down there, too. They were NOT just his. Well, finally it was the fifth outbreak and fit so Duane went and brought Ethan up to the time-out chair and said, "You're going to sit here for five minutes and think about what life would be like without a single one of those toys! Because if we can't learn to share what we have, we'll simply get rid of it!"
Through mild sobs, Ethan nodded "Okay."
But Duane continued, "You are my son and I want to teach you what is a good choice and what is a bad choice... I want you to grow up to be a good man, so I will help you to learn when you are making bad choices. Because I love you."
I could still hear Ethan sniffling.
"Ethan, do you understand?"
Sniff, sniff... "Yeah. But my heart is still a bit broken."
There was a pause as Duane pondered how to address that one while I sat in the kitchen being witness to this exchange. I figured Ethan was struggling with a "little broken heart" because he had been scolded but I was surprised at what ensued.
"Well, Ethan, how can we make your heart all better?"
Ethan sniffed a couple more times and I heard him answer "Once I go back downstairs and apologize to Anika and Sivana, it will be all better."
My dear ones, this was one of those GAFAW moments for me. I have always known that bitterness, resentment, egocentricity caused more harm to ourselves than to others but this was a self-awareness moment that confirmed it for me. Ethan knew something wasn't right in his heart because he had not made himself accountable for his mistake, yet. Rather than be stubborn or hold his ground, he humbled himself by accepting where he had been in the wrong, and knew it required ACTION on his part to make it right.
The learning never stops around here and quite frankly, I have to admit I feel we do most of the learning as adults than the kids do! Their eyes see truth, their hearts seek it without question... always a good reminder of WHY our Saviour told us we had to have the hearts of children to enter into the kingdom of Heaven.
May you embrace the child still within your heart and remember what it is like to want truth no matter what... no matter our stubborn stances or desire to be justified... to simply want what is right. And may you be fearless in your accountability or better yet... freed.
I love you all very much, not because I presume to KNOW you and your life story, but because you are a child of God, just like me. My brothers, my sisters who struggle to know what is righteous just like I do... which more often than not seems to mean learning through mistakes. I love you because you are not alone. I love you because we all have our hearts a little bit broken. Whoever you all are out there, I ask God to bless you and to comfort you.
Always and with much love, your sister... Rita.