The full moon has risen and lights up this beautiful farm as though God were shining a flashlight right at us! Silence hangs in the air like a morning fog carrying the sounds of the crickets. There is great peace at this moment and rather than send my thankful prayer to find you without you even knowing it, I am sharing this with you directly.
Living in the country again has re-awakened my connection with the earth and nature… I’d nearly forgotten how intense that could be. I have found the beauty and grace of God in His natural sanctuaries that surround us here, in the plants that grow, in the fields that bloom and the harvests reaped by those who sowed with faith. My darling Duane has had an early harvest for his organic oats and flax. I had the benefit of helping on occasion when harvesting would lead into the wee hours of the morning. One of those nights, the sky was on fire with the setting sun to the west and a rising orange moon to the east and a lightning show to the north. I’d spent the day studying seeds in my herbology course so to go from witnessing the miracle of a seed to the magnitude of an endless sky filled with wonder… needless to say all I could whisper to myself was “How Great Thou Art, Lord.” To create such intense beauty affirms for me the beauty in all of our hearts. Anything His hand has touched must contain His beauty, right?
Married life has taken some adjusting on both of our parts. I apparently generate far too much heat at night, Duane snaps his ankle repeatedly when he can’t sleep, there are some smells on the farm that just can’t be “washed out”, etc… With summer being Duane’s busy time, we seldom see each other except at night when we visit scripture together and thank God for our countless blessings. We laugh often and learn from each other and our humbling moments. He is stubborn as a mule, though! He cut his hand while fixing a combine out in the field during harvest and I was there with the 4-wheeler telling him to get on so we could get back to the house to clean and bandage his hand properly (he was bleeding all over the place). Well apparently taking 5 minutes to tend to a wound is not possible in the middle of harvest… so I nearly had to grab him by the ear to drag him back to the house. I finally told him in sheer frustration “If farming doesn’t kill you, I will!” For some reason, he thought this was funny.
We continue to challenge each other through incredible discussions and philosophical debates. It’s WONDERFUL!!! I can speak my wonky language of imagery and he understands. Even when I can only speak in hand gestures with sound effects, he understands! If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.
I am reminded of the first time my father met Duane. It was at my step-brother’s wedding social. Keep in mind that my philosophy is to get on a dance floor and dance such homemade moves as “the dancing cow”, “digging the grave”, “goin’ fishin’” and “the spin cycle”. My theory being that when no one is on the dance floor and I go out and start dancing these moves, within 2 songs the dance floor is filled with people who no doubt thought to themselves “no matter how badly I dance, I won’t look as bad as that poor girl”.
It works every time!
Even though I’d only known Duane a month at this point, I didn’t hold back on the humbling dance moves. My father sat across from Duane and leaned over to him and said “it’s a good thing you don’t scare easily.”
Hmmm, thanks dad!
But here we are, happily married and enjoying a life dedicated to farming ethically, growing our first child together and growing in faith as husband and wife. We are truly, truly blessed!
The wedding was wonderful… a perfect day filled with sunshine for our outdoor ceremony at dad’s farm. We were even blessed with a little shower like a greeting from above. We felt so peaceful and calm as though the moment had always existed. Hard to explain but the beauty remains in the unspoken understanding and knowing.
Mélina and Isabel were such angels as Mélina pushed Isabel down the grass aisle in her wheelchair. I wanted to be married feeling the earth beneath my feet so my girls and I were barefoot. These two have taken to the farm like a fish to water. Mélina has blossomed leaving her uncertainty/sensitivity/timidity behind, exploring the farm, taming the kittens, loading hay with Duane and helping him clean the seed bins, riding the tractors and 4 wheeler, doing laundry and helping with dishes. She is soaring and I have thanked God for the reassurance that we are where we are meant to be. Duane gleams with pride when he talks about his step-daughters and the two of us sit there at the supper table or before going to bed and complain about how much we miss them the weeks they are with James. I have married an insomniac so I have a partner to help care for Isabel on those challenging nights. And some of our best visits occur at 3:00 a.m.
My pregnancy continues to go very well. Other than a few serious bouts of fatigue this past month, I have had no other symptoms except a rapidly growing belly. I am 23 weeks pregnant and this baby kicks to his/her little heart’s content, particularly when papa is reading the bible out loud. I love this rounding belly and the gift of carrying this little one around with me everywhere I go. My hand is slowly becoming permanently attached to my belly. What joy to have life growing within you! What privilege!
So there you have it. A bit of an update which finally excludes not-so-great news about Isabel. We are blessed to report a nice, smooth span of time without any complications. She has doubled her weight and has lost a few more teeth. She has officially starting grade 2 this week and continues to shine like a bright star amidst her peers who love her.
Life is abundant and this multitude of blessings leaves me shaking my head in wonder… how could I ever thank Him enough?
So thank you for touching my life and for sharing with me this moment in time. You are loved and cherished and best of all is the fact that I pray for you all nearly every night without you even realizing it! But alas, I let you in on this because I want you to know that time does not constrain any ties I share with any of you… that you are timeless in my heart and ever present in the pages of my life story.
Search This Blog
Friday, 8 September 2006
Wednesday, 7 June 2006
A Song for Isabel
I can only imagine heaven’s tears
As the angels waved goodbye.
And with determination you came to me
Heaven’s remnants in your eyes.
Baby, baby darling born to me
Life has spared you no pain
And though you cannot speak a word to me,
I hear what you say,
“Life is every breath you take
Whether laboured like mine or not,
And success is every step you take
Doesn’t matter if you can’t walk.”
“Beauty is what you choose to see
It doesn’t matter if you’re blind
The truest love is unspoken
Through prayers for humankind.”
Baby, baby darling born to me,
I’ve learned so much from you
Your sacrifice unites family
And strangers know you, too.
But hush my little baby
This pain won’t last too long
You’re wings are growing stronger
They are hearing heaven’s song.
But you do not end this journey
Until love has sowed its plan
You smile as life escapes you
Until you feel we understand…
As the angels waved goodbye.
And with determination you came to me
Heaven’s remnants in your eyes.
Baby, baby darling born to me
Life has spared you no pain
And though you cannot speak a word to me,
I hear what you say,
“Life is every breath you take
Whether laboured like mine or not,
And success is every step you take
Doesn’t matter if you can’t walk.”
“Beauty is what you choose to see
It doesn’t matter if you’re blind
The truest love is unspoken
Through prayers for humankind.”
Baby, baby darling born to me,
I’ve learned so much from you
Your sacrifice unites family
And strangers know you, too.
But hush my little baby
This pain won’t last too long
You’re wings are growing stronger
They are hearing heaven’s song.
But you do not end this journey
Until love has sowed its plan
You smile as life escapes you
Until you feel we understand…
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)